Day 11 – This is getting TOUGH!

Today was, on the whole, pretty crappy all round. Didn’t have a great sleep and woke up (was woken up very, very early that should read) in a pretty bad mood. Work was stressful and frustrating and I found it hard not to lose my rag a couple of times. Its really hard at the moment because I feel like I’m absolutely busting my gut for a company that doesn’t want to offer me a permanent contract because they want to ‘keep us flexible’ (read: they want to be able to sack us if we start slacking). I’m the highest achiever on my team even though I’ve been there the shortest amount of time, and I have been since moving onto this team, and I’ve been asked if anyone on my team has any queries or problems to refer to me. Oh did I mention that they all have permanent contracts purely because they’ve been there longer. I work bloody hard and it just feels like there’s no reward or recognition whatsoever but they’ve beasically said unless we’re ‘outstanding’ then we won’t even get considered for permanent contracts. Its just frustrating and most days I don’t let it get to me but today my cases were just so awful that it really started getting me down.

On the way home from work my car started playing up again even though it was meant to have been fixed yesterday, so I am NOT happy that the garage charged me through the nose for now fixing my car, and then every time I tried to call them it was engaged. Grrrrrr. Sorry for today’s post, I’m just going on a bit of a rant. All of this caused a lot of stress and a lot of CRAVINGS! Sugary cravings. It was very hard not to throw the towel in today, very very hard. But I do not quit, I am not a quitter (I used to be, but I am not anymore). There was lots of cake in work and being surrounded by it felt like torture. Not to mention that I could have murdered a nice glass of wine when I got home.

I’ve felt tired and a bit bloated in myself today and my eczema is playing up really badly. My hands are agony, I was hoping that maybe eating better would help, but no luck yet. I’m hoping I start feeling the Whole 30 magic soon. I did manage to have a nice evening with my boys though. We had lots of cuddles and playing and my little one is starting to take proper steps now which is very exciting! He’s so cuddly and the moment and having him come over and give me a big cuddle really does make everything else just melt away and seem so insignificant. Nearly time for Great British Bake Off (which is still weirdly soothing to watch other people make cakes), and then an early night. Meeting friends in the park in the morning which will be nice :-).

What I ate:

Breakfast – Banana and leftover chicken, bacon and broccoli quiche.

Lunch – Leftover slow cooker Puerco Pibil

Dinner – Homemade (by my lovely husband) beef burgers in large flat grilled mushrooms and salad

Snack – Small punnet of almonds, goji berries, raisins, sunflower and pumpkin seeds

If you’re still reading, hope you had a lovely day and see you tomorrow xx


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